I am working on a movie. It's about me but it's not exactly autobiographical. I play a hyper-real version of myself, a guy who has the same name as me, lives in my apartment and thinks the same sort of thoughts I do.

The distinction is important. According to Heisenberg's uncertainty principle if I just document my life then the result will be bollocks, because through the act of observation I'll actually change who I am. This means I would end up with a movie about someone else - maybe Jet Li or Tom Waites. So instead I play a character like me and thus the movie will actually be more about me, depending on how well I can carry the role. I've done some community theater so I think I've got the acting thing covered. It's ingenious really.

Why make a movie about myself? Well frankly, it's because I've got this huge ego! Also, if I portray myself in a properly flattering manner I might get laid more often.

Ok so are there any OTHER reasons? Movies can combine different categories of expression. I do music, painting, improvisational performance, acting, sculpture and so on. Most of these things translate pretty well to the screen and the process of collage will likely reveal vital connections - clues. Underneath the bluster of vanity I've stashed the secret agenda.

I've got hundreds of hours of archival film and video, some shot by others and lots shot by me. A cache of fossils, ground water, dormant seeds - treasure. My mission is encoded there - imagine history decrypted.

I live the movies and novels I've ingested. I am not just a science fiction fan, I am science fiction. These days, it's tough to find anything more fantastic than my media feeds. Speculative films and novels rarely rival my daily existence.

My life feels like what a great film should be, maybe that's a hint. Making a film about my life turns the universe inside out and then, speaking to me in her voice like ocean waves god says - you go boy! etc.

I've posted the prologue but it's password protected. If you are an industry big wig, fat cat, heavy hitter, mover, shaker or star maker then send me the keys to your cabana in Kaua'i and perhaps I'll let you have a peek.