This section is password protected because I am learning not to throw pearls before swine. If you are reading this you are either a government spook, a technological trickster or someone I invited. If the latter, then welcome! The following may be relevant to you.

I've been getting demonstrations of what's possible. On September 17, 2003 I was hiking in the forest at night with a heavy backpack. It was almost completely dark and I chose to keep my flashlight off. I walked 6 miles in a state that I cannot easily describe. I stumbled onto a new mode of perception, able to sense objects before touching them, tripping over them or being impaled by them. I did fall once but it was actually kind of fun, like flying.

This summer a couple of other incidents caught my attention. I was riding my motorcycle around the southern horn of Manhattan on the way to a video shoot when a Toyota sedan cut me off - I had maybe 3 seconds to react. I clamped on the brakes for as long as I could, then just before the impact I rose up on the pegs and... teleported. The bike's front wheel hit the front passenger wheel of the car and then the body of the bike spun around and slammed into the passenger door. The next clear memory I have is of standing over the bike which had fallen but was still running. I bent down, turned off the ignition and took out the key. The bike had hit the car with enough momentum to crush the bike's forks AND fold in the car's wheel. I have a vague memory of bouncing off the car myself but I can't say for sure. I was a little sore in a couple of spots, but nothing major. What happened exactly?

A month or two later I was about a week away from finishing a double life size sculpture. This piece was about 7 feet high and weighed about 700 lbs. I was rolling it to it's storage spot and grabbing the armature a little too high while tugging it toward me. Suddenly the whole thing tipped and I grabbed it. I felt about 200 lbs on me and I thought - "no big deal, I can handle this" - so I started to push back. Instead of popping back up, the weight on me rapidly increased as the wheels slipped out from under the base - 300, 400, 500lbs... Then the whole thing hit the ground and I wasn't under it anymore. A friend who was standing nearby watched it happen. He said I tossed the whole thing away and jumped back somehow. Tossed it away? 500+ lbs? I was already pretty compressed from trying to support the weight, so I am not sure how I managed to jump back.

What these situations suggest is that I may be developing some new abilities, specifically improved flexibility, reaction time and movement beyond muscle. I attribute this to the combination of yoga which I've been studying for over a decade and Tai Chi which I started practicing last spring. Although I don't totally understand the effect Tai Chi is having, I can say for certain that there is a profound effect.

Another reason for my new powers might be the emerging global crisis. Perhaps my latent abilities are being activated as a response to the advent of american fascism, to the aggression and oppression that mark the police industrial empire.* This feels possible.

It's also possible I am totally loony.

Either way, it's likely someone will try to throw a net over me. My only course of action is a crash course in the way of the warrior. This Tai Chi thing is not just an exotic way to stay in shape, it's part of my training. Let history decide whether I'm off my gourd, in the meantime there's work to be done.

• 12/19-22/04 •

*Yes Virginia there really is a MATRIX.

MATRIX—the Multistate Anti-Terrorism Information Exchange, a network of state databases subsidized by the Department of Homeland Security and the Justice Department.

Not exactly a good omen, this.